The letter below was sent by Fr. Demetrios Carellas on Monday of
Bright Week this year. The content is a valuable reminder for each of us
as long-standing conflict is often a stumbling block for many and personal
peace remains elusive. I hope you’ll have time to read it in its
entirety:
"It is the day of the Resurrection; let us be
radiant in the
festival, and let us embrace one another. Let us
say, O brethren,
even to those who hate us: Let us forgive all things
on the Resurrection..."
[Resurrection Doxastikon in the 1st Plagal tone]
Christ is risen!
This year, the words of the
closing hymn of the Resurrection Matins service really spoke to my heart.
It is: a call to heart-centered intimacy; a call to forgive everything -
past and present - in the spirit of the never-ending JOY of our Saviour's Holy
Resurrection, even to those who hate us.
Well, then, should not this
Christ-centered call apply also to family members and friends with whom we are
currently - at best - 'benignly rejecting', and - at worse - festering
bitterness and/or contempt? My brothers and sisters in the risen Lord
Jesus, how can we expect our Lord to - as another Resurrection hymn states
- "make our lives peaceful", if we continue to
show Him our contempt through the way we treat those closest
to us?
What a glorious time this is for
us to let go of our anger, harshness and judgment of those
whom we feel have offended us, rejected us, been cruel to us
--- even for years? And here is the most effective way to do this: We
must pray that our Lord Jesus will grant us His grace to take full blame for
the conflict, and not expect any apology from the other party --- even if, by
the standards of this fallen world, we were ones being "wronged".
In this way, my beloved sojourners on the sea of life, we will be
victorious, even if the other person chooses to reject our efforts. I
have total confidence in the truth of what I am sharing with you, because I have
frequently read about these things in the teachings of our holy Church Fathers,
and in the lives of our Saints; and actually have seen living results of it in
my 37+ years of service to our Lord Jesus and His Church.
When we surrender our wills to
Christ in this manner, then He will give to our hearts at least these two
things: His peace, "which surpasses all understanding"; and a love
for the other person that is no longer me-centered and conditional, but
Christ-centered and unconditional! And then we will experience and inward
freedom, that words cannot circumscribe!
However, (please forgive the
length of this!) we cannot approach the other person with any hidden
agenda; or our efforts will bear no good fruit. A story from the
Desert Fathers will clearly illustrate this: Once two monks at a
Monastery became quite angry with one another, and begin to harbor resentment
for one another. One of the monks decided to make an attempt reconciliation
with his brother. However, on the way to speak with him, he allowed the
devil to fill his thoughts with memories of the unkind things the other had
said to him, and to put in his mind that: if he asked for forgiveness, then the
other monk had to do likewise. Thus, the reconciliation attempt failed
completely.
Therefore the monk went to his
Spiritual Father, who explained to him that his hidden agenda made it
impossible for God's grace to enter into the conversation. Therefore, he
instructed his spiritual child to pray fervently for God's grace; and to
approach his brother --- unconditionally, and willing to accept full blame for
the loss of their friendship. Approaching his brother's cell in this
manner, armed him with with God's grace, their division was destroyed!
O my dear and blessed brothers
and sisters in the risen Lord, think of what healing power would start taking
place within ourselves, our families, our parishes, even our Nations, if you
and I choose to follow this path during the next 38 days --- if we
too "forgive all things on the Resurrection!
Truly He is risen!
Your servant in Christ,
+Fr. Demetrios
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